


Now and Forever

by Brumeier



Series: TCHS Class of 1994 [2]
Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Canonical Character Death, Closeted Character, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Cheating, M/M, Reconciliation, School Reunion, Wedding Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-18
Updated: 2018-09-18
Packaged: 2019-07-13 23:37:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,712
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16028369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Brumeier/pseuds/Brumeier
Summary: When Danny goes to his ten year high school reunion, his life hasn't exactly gone as planned. But thanks to his meddling friend Steph, things might just turn out okay after all.





	Now and Forever

**Author's Note:**

> whatif_au challenge: high school/college

**June 2004**

_Well it's too late, tonight_   
_To drag the past out into the light_   
_We're one, but we're not the same_   
_We get to carry each other_   
_Carry each other_

Danny paused at the open doors, the sounds of U2 and chattering voices washing over him. The gym was festooned with black and red streamers, and a slide show was flashing yearbook pictures behind the DJ. Ten years seemed like no time at all, but also like forever. So much had happened since he’d graduated. He was a totally different person now. He – 

"Danny Williams, you son of a bitch!"

A blur in a blue dress flew at him and he caught her, staggering back a few steps. "Are you _insane_?"

Steph pressed a wet kiss to his cheek and backed up enough that Danny could see her baby bump. "I'll have you know my therapist thinks I'm perfectly normal."

Despite his initial trepidations, it was like all the years just melted away. Steph was still the same crazy best friend she'd been in high school. They’d kept in touch over the years, first with letters and then with email, but it had been at least five years since Danny had seen her in person.

"So? What do you think?" Steph turned to the side, framing her belly. "I'm not just fat. I'm fat with _purpose_."

Danny laughed. "You look beautiful. Remind me when you’re due?"

"Three and a half months. And there's the who." Steph waved at someone by the refreshment table. "You finally get to meet Carlos. Isn't he sexy?"

The man who came over was well-dressed and dark-skinned, much sexier in person than the photos Steph had sent, though Danny wasn't about to admit that out loud. More importantly, Carlos looked at Steph with nothing but love in his eyes and that's all Danny needed to know about him.

“Nice to finally meet you,” Danny said. They shook hands. “You’re a brave man.”

“She’s worth it,” Carlos replied with just the hint of an accent. 

“He wants to make an honest woman of me,” Steph said, laughing. “That ship has obviously sailed.”

They were obviously head over heels in love with each other, and it made Danny’s chest ache a little because he missed having that for himself.

Without further ado, Steph dragged him into the gym and pushed a cup of punch in his hand. It wasn't long before guys from the baseball team joined them and they started rehashing some of their more memorable games. That somehow segued into sharing pictures of their kids.

"Who knew a guy ugly as you could have such a cute kid," Dale teased. He himself had two little boys.

"She's the cutest kid in the world. Until mine gets here." Steph snatched the wallet from Danny's hand and flipped through the pictures he kept in there. "This is still my favorite, though."

She turned the picture around to show baby Grace wearing a Navy onesie and a tiny sailor’s cap.

*o*o*o*

**2001**

The ship-to-shore connection was terrible, with a really annoying delay that meant Danny and Steve were constantly talking over each other. It made telling Steve the news even harder.

"Steven, please stop talking. Just...I have to get this out. Okay?" Danny waited for Steve's agreement to come across the line. "I'm not proud of this. So I'm just gonna say it. I was feeling lonely and I got really drunk and I did something really stupid. I got a girl pregnant."

The silence stretched on so long Danny thought they'd gotten disconnected.

_But...you're not like that_ , Steve said finally.

He meant Danny wasn't attracted to girls, never had been. And he also didn't over-indulge with alcohol. Those things were both true. But being away from Steve was hard and having to be so careful about his feelings for Steve was even harder. Danny was a rookie cop and Steve was working under the shadow of DADT and neither of them could be open about their relationship.

Danny met Rachel at a party and got loaded enough that he thought it wouldn't be a big deal to sleep with a woman for the first time in his life. She was pretty, and she was full of compliments, and most importantly she was there. The regret had come the next day, along with the confirmation that soft breasts and womanly curves still did nothing for him.

"I know I'm not. And this hasn't changed that, okay. I just...I wanted you to know that I'm gonna be a dad. It's kind of a big deal. I’m kind of terrified."

_Congratulations_ , Steve said, and even with the crappy connection Danny could hear the hurt in his voice.

"This doesn't change anything," Danny insisted. 

_It changes everything. I have to go._

Danny kept the phone to his ear even after the line went dead, a lump in his throat so big he could barely swallow. One night. It had been one night, one time, and now everything was ruined.

He was fully prepared to resent Rachel and resent the baby, almost as much as he was hating himself for what he'd done, but the first time he set eyes on Grace all he could feel was awe. She was a tiny, perfect little human being.

A couple of weeks after Grace was born Danny got a package in the mail, covered in overseas postage. It was a onesie printed with US Navy Baby. There was no note attached. That was the last time Danny heard from Steve.

*o*o*o*

**2004**

"Still no word from your baby mama?" Steph asked. They were sitting at one of the tables, which had been draped with white linen and covered in black and red confetti.

"She moved back to England to stay with her parents. She’s not ready to be a mom, she said."

"Threw you right in the deep end, huh?"

Danny nodded ruefully. To be honest, he hadn't felt any more ready than Rachel had. But Grace had needed him and he'd stepped up. With help from his parents, of course, and his sisters. He was working out of Newark and Toni-Marie had come to stay with him while she took some college courses at Rutgers-Newark. She was till trying to figure out what she wanted to be when she grew up.

"I know you're a great dad," Steph said. She patted her belly. "Not sure how it's gonna go for me, to be honest. Hard to imagine, right? Me someone's mom? I can barely keep my hamster alive."

Danny remembered how Steph had been in high school, doling out lots of tough love when her friends were acting like jerks. Which was often.

"You'll be a great mom," he said. "The fun mom you don't want to piss off."

Steph laughed and kissed Danny on the cheek. The DJ started playing _Self Esteem_ , which got Steph out of her chair pretty quickly for a pregnant lady.

"Offspring! Let's dance!"

She dragged Danny to the middle of the gym, kicked off her shoes, and started jumping around, hands cupped under her belly.

"You trying to shake that baby loose?" Danny yelled over the music.

"Come on, Detective! Or have you forgotten how we do it in the 'Burg?"

Danny narrowed his eyes. He wasn't about to be shown up by a mom-to-be. "Oh, it's on!"

*o*o*o*

Danny wandered around the school, hands in his pockets. Hanging out in the gym had gotten to be a little too much, with everyone asking about Steve. As if Danny could really say what was going on with them. Or not going on with them, such as it was.

He paused in front of the trophy case. The baseball team had made it to the state playoffs two years after Danny graduated. He liked to think they might have made it when he was still on the team if he hadn’t screwed up his knee in that car accident. He’d always regretted not being able to play after that.

His brother Matt’s picture was in there, too. The Tornadoes were state champions two years before his untimely death in a convenience store in Paramus, and he’d been team MVP. Danny had been missing his big brother a lot since he’d become a dad. Grace had a legion of aunts, but she’d never get to know her uncle.

Danny’s gaze drifted over, the pull almost magnetic. Steve was front and center of the group photo of the football team, everyone in their Tornado uniforms. Still the handsomest guy Danny had ever met. They’d won the division championship in 1994. Coach Bryant had yelled at Steve for not joining the team a year earlier because he’d been such a good player; he’d really propelled the whole team forward. Danny had been so proud of him. 

Steve had changed a lot from the angry loner he’d been when he came to live with his aunt and uncle. He’d been grieving the loss of his mother and hurt by his father sending him away from home. Danny still wasn’t sure why he’d persisted with Steve in those early months. Maybe he’d recognized a kindred spirit. Maybe he had heretofore unknown gaydar that was super sensitive.

It hadn’t always been smooth sailing between them, but those were still some of the best times Danny’d ever had. Or maybe it was the glow of nostalgia. He remembered kissing Steve on the deck of the _Intrepid_ during that crazy heatwave, not caring who saw. They’d had to keep things under wraps, but to Danny it had always seemed so obvious how they felt about each other. How could people not know?

The worst day, up until that ill-fated phone call, had been saying goodbye when Danny went off to college and Steve went off to the Naval Academy.

*o*o*o*

**1994**

It seemed fitting to say their goodbyes in the park. How many times in the last two years had they met up there, to talk or argue or just get away from their families for a little while? Under cover of darkness they could hold hands and sit close and kiss each other breathless.

“This is gonna be too hard,” Steve said, head resting against Danny’s. “I don’t want to pretend you’re just my friend.”

Danny knew Steve had been struggling with his decision to join the Navy now that Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell was a thing. He couldn’t be out, but then neither could Danny, who was going to join the Police Academy after college.

“It won’t be forever,” Danny promised, even though he knew no such thing. There was no telling where Steve’s Navy career would take him, but it sure wouldn’t be Trenton.

“Maybe…maybe we should just end things now,” Steve whispered.

Danny jerked back, glowering. “What? No! How would _that_ be any easier?”

The only thing that kept him from getting up and leaving right then was the tearful expression on Steve’s face. The guy wasn’t great at expressing himself, especially when his emotions were running high. Danny would give him a chance to explain, but that didn’t make him any less mad. Or panicky.

“You shouldn’t have to wait around for me like that. It’s not fair to you.”

“Oh, I see. The martyr routine again.” Danny cupped Steve’s face in his hands, forced him to keep eye contact. “I don’t want anyone but you. Okay? So don’t do me any favors.”

Steve kissed him, hard, and he tasted like tears. He fumbled with the zipper on Danny’s pants, and then shoved his hand inside Danny’s underwear. They’d never done that out in public before and Danny felt a little zing of excitement mixed in with the fear of getting caught. But not enough to stop.

They jerked each other off in the park, Danny wishing all the while they had time to do things right, make a better parting memory. Afterwards, as they panted against each other’s necks, Danny had a few tears of his own. Nothing would be the same from here on out.

“I’m gonna miss you, you emotional hamster,” he said.

Steve huffed out a laugh. “I love you, too, Danno.”

*o*o*o*

**2004**

“Why are we in the basement?” Danny asked.

He could hear the thumping beat of the music playing up in the gym but couldn’t make out what song it was. Steph was leading him past the boiler room and records storage to points unknown. He hadn’t had much occasion to visit the basement when he was a student.

“Joe and I used to come down here to make out,” Steph said. “He bribed Mr. Finchly with booze.”

“Nice,” Danny replied. Steph’s high school boyfriend had excelled at the five-finger discount, especially from his father’s liquor store. As Danny recalled, Mr. Perelli had laughed it off as a boys-being-boys thing. He wondered if the sentiment had changed at all in light of Joe’s intermittent jail stays over the last ten years.

“Here it is.”

Mr. Finchly’s office wasn’t very big. There was a desk with a computer on it, a mini fridge by the door, and a cot in the corner that had no doubt seen a lot of action during their time in high school. It was a little bit gross, if he was being honest.

“If that cot could only talk,” Danny teased.

“I miss him sometimes,” Steph said softly.

“Mr. Finchly?”

She punched him in the arm. “No, Joe. I used to think he was the love of my life.”

“Everyone with a high school romance thinks that.”

“Did you?”

Danny gave her a sharp look. “What?”

“Oh, please. Like I couldn’t tell you and Steve were an item? With all the drama and goofy looks and stuff? I’m not an idiot, you know.” Steph leaned back against the desk, arms crossed over her chest. “You two were so gone on each other. It was different than what Joe and I had. It was real.”

“But…you never said anything.” Danny wasn’t sure how to feel. Relieved that his best friend knew? Disappointed that she never told him so he could’ve talked to her about things?

“If you’d wanted me to know, you’d have told me. Although, just for the record? You’re an asshole for not trusting me with this.”

Danny gave her a hug, and after a second she hugged him back. “I was too scared to let anyone know.”

“And now?”

“Now I’m a cop. It wouldn’t go over well, not in my precinct anyway.”

Steph gave him a kiss on the cheek and rubbed the lipstick smear away with her thumb. “I’m sorry it has to be that way for you.”

“It is what it is.”

“You know I love you, right?”

Danny couldn’t help grinning. “Yeah, I do.”

“Good. Hold on to that.”

Steph gave him a shove that sent him stumbling backward and moved faster than any pregnant woman had a right to. In a flash she was back out in the hall, slamming the office door shut. And locking it.

Danny pounded on the door. “Steph! What the fuck?”

“Hang tight! I’ll be right back!”

Danny glared at the door. “Steph! Hey! You can’t lock a cop in the basement!”

But she was clearly gone. Danny sighed. He didn’t know what Steph was playing at, but he was starting to wish he’d stayed home.

*o*o*o*

**Earlier that Evening**

“Oh, don’t you look handsome!” Danny’s mother fussed with his tie. 

“Ha’some!” Grace echoed. She looked up from the line of My Little Ponies she was playing with. Danny’s dad was on the floor with her, providing horse noises. “Daddy’s pretty.”

“Thanks, monkey,” Danny replied with a grin.

“Daddy, look! Peachy Pie!” Gracie waved around one of the pink ponies.

“I see. Very nice.”

Danny’s mother stepped back and gave him a soft look. “Still no word?”

He knew she’d been hoping Steve would come to the reunion. She worried about him doing dangerous work now that he was a SEAL, and she was mad at him for dropping out of contact with everyone instead of talking things out. 

As far as Danny knew, his mother was the only member of the family who’d clued in to his relationship with Steve back in high school. The others had seemed legitimately surprised when he’d come out to them while he was in college.

“He’ll come around,” Pop said.

“It’s been two years,” Danny reminded him. Two long, endless years. Steve might’ve fallen off the face of the Earth, except Danny’s mother got semi-regular updates from Leigh and Tommy McGarrett.

“That boy needs a hug. And a swift kick to the rear.”

“Let it go, Ma. Okay?”

“Let it go,” Grace parroted. “Pop-Pop want to brush?”

Danny smirked at his dad, who was now combing out pony manes with his granddaughter. He was grateful that Grace got to spend so much time with her extended family. There’d been nothing but silence from Rachel’s, though he was good about sending her regular updates and pictures. He didn’t understand how anyone could say no to having a relationship with Grace. She was the best thing in the world.

“Come give me a kiss,” Danny said, squatting down. “I have to go.”

Gracie abandoned the ponies and ran over, wrapping her arms around Danny’s neck. She gave him a loud, wet smack on the cheek and he did the same in return.

“Be good for Pop-Pop and Nana. Daddy loves you!”

“Gracie loves Daddy!”

“Go,” Danny’s mom said. She picked up Grace. “Have fun. Tell Stephanie I said hello.”

“Thanks, Ma.” Danny gave her a kiss, too, and headed out the door.

He couldn’t resist looking in the direction of the park and wishing Steve was there, sitting on one of the tables and waiting for him.

*o*o*o*

**Back in the Basement**

There was a vent in the ceiling of Mr. Finchly’s office and Danny could hear the music from the gym filtering down through it.

_No time to search the world around_   
_'Cause you know where I'll be found_   
_When I come around_

Billie Joe Armstrong was diluted due to distance, but Danny tapped his foot along anyway. It wasn’t like he had anything else to do. Well, except take another pull off the bottle of Captain Morgan he’d found in Mr. Finchly’s desk drawer. Somehow it seemed a fitting way to cap off the reunion, sitting alone in the basement drinking the janitor’s rum.

When Danny heard the murmur of voices outside the door he got to his feet, ready to make his move. He’d sent Steph about fifty angry text messages and he was going to give her a very hefty piece of his mind when she opened that door.

He never got the chance, because the door opened up only just enough for someone else to get shoved through, and then it locked again. Danny was knocked back into the wall and cracked his elbow on the painted cinderblock.

“Ow! Goddammit! Steph, I’m gonna kill you!”

“Danny?”

His curses died in his throat the second he realized who was in the room with him. Pain in his elbow forgotten, Danny just stared. Steve, resplendent in his blue Navy uniform, hat tucked under his arm. The last time Danny had seen him was at Annapolis, when Steve had graduated. He looked different. Older in a way that had nothing to do with age and everything to do with experience.

Danny got his breath back and pushed past Steve to bang on the door. “Steph! Let me out of here!”

“No can do, Williams,” Steph shouted through the door. “You two jerks were always trying to get me to fix things for you. Well, you didn’t ask this time but I’m doing it anyway. Talk it out, fight it out, fuck it out, I don’t care which. Just deal with it!”

And then that pregnant meddler was gone again. Danny dropped his head against the door with a _thunk_.

“I hate my life,” he muttered. “How the hell did a woman that pregnant get the drop on a SEAL?”

“What did you want me to do? Choke her out?”

Danny turned around, pressing his back against the door. Jesus, Steve looked good. From a purely aesthetic point of view, of course.

“What are you doing here?”

Steve was standing so stiffly at attention his spine might’ve been a steel rod. “It’s my reunion, too. Maybe I just wanted to see my old friends.”

“I call bullshit on that, Steven.”

“What the hell do you want me to say? That I was wrong?”

Danny crossed his arms over his chest. He wanted to reach out and touch Steve so much he had to physically restrain himself. He was still angry, but that old desire never went away.

“That would be a good start. Some groveling wouldn’t go amiss.”

“You’re the one who fucked around,” Steve said. 

They were both angry. Wonderful. Well, Danny had dealt with his guilt over what happened, and he’d moved on. He was sorry he’d hurt Steve, but how could he regret Grace?

“I had one unfortunate moment of human fallibility,” Danny corrected. “One drunken night. And I’d have apologized properly for that if you hadn’t dropped me like a hot coal. It’s not so easy trying to find a SEAL, did you know that? That information tends to be highly classified.”

He’d tried. For the first two months, he’d really tried. But he couldn’t go up against the entire might of the US Navy to find one man who didn’t want to be found. And while the McGarretts had been sympathetic, they’d honored Steve’s wishes to stay out of contact with Danny.

Steve didn’t look moved. “I never cheated on you.”

“Well, sorry I’m not as perfect as you are. Was that part of your military training?”

“Fuck you!” Steve snapped.

“Fuck you right back! I could’ve used a little support from you these past couple of years, Steve. You think it’s easy, being a single dad? Because it’s not. You should’ve been part of Grace’s life, but you chose not to be. And don’t you dare try and make me apologize for her. She’s the best, most beautiful thing in an otherwise shitty world and if I had to do it all over again I probably would, just for her.”

Danny’s blood was fairly singing with his anger and the potential for a physical fight, but Steve seemed to deflate right before his eyes. He dropped down on the cot, head in his hands.

“Aunt Leigh sent me a picture. She’s beautiful.”

“She takes after Rachel’s side of the family.”

“When you told me…it felt like losing my mother all over again. You were all I had.”

Okay, there might still be a little residual guilt. Danny tried to hang on to the anger, which was easier, but then Steve had never been easy. Not even that first day of school when they exchanged punches in the hall.

“I was lonely, which I know isn’t an excuse,” Danny said softly. “Being away from you is hard. Not being able to tell people I’m with you is harder. I had a shitty day, I drank too much, and I made a mistake.”

He didn’t bother pointing out that he hadn’t been with anyone since Rachel. Why would Steve believe him, since he seemed to think Danny had been sleeping around like some kind of gigolo? 

“I’m sorry, too,” Steve said. He looked up at Danny, his heart in his eyes like it always was if people knew to look. “I think I convinced myself it was better, stepping aside. That you could have a better life without me.”

Danny surrendered. Waved the proverbial white flag. He was tired of being angry and sad and lonely. Steve was more important than that. _They_ were more important. He walked across the small office and cradled Steve’s face in his hands.

“Babe. There’s no one better for me than you.”

Steve let out a shuddering breath and leaned into Danny’s touch, eyes closed. Danny kissed his forehead, apology and forgiveness all in one.

“It’s not too late?” Steve whispered.

“Never too late. Not for us.” A slow song was coming through the vent, and Danny pulled Steve to his feet. “Dance with me. They’re playing our song.”

“We don’t have a song,” Steve protested, but he wrapped his arms around Danny and started swaying to the music with him. 

_Whenever I'm weary_   
_From the battles that rage in my head_   
_You make sense of madness_   
_When my sanity hangs by a thread_   
_I lose my way but still you seem to understand_   
_Now and forever_   
_I will be your man_

“How long are you in town?” Danny asked, reveling in the feel of Steve’s firm, lean body pressed against his. It had been much too long.

“Just the weekend.”

“I’d really like you to meet Grace.”

Steve’s hold on him tightened. “I…I’d really like that, Danno.”

Danny found himself almost near tears just from hearing that stupid old nickname. “And then we’re going to fuck like bunnies before the Navy snatches you away again.”

Steve laughed, and then they were kissing. They had ten years behind them, and hopefully many, many more stretching ahead. All things considered, Danny was glad he went to the reunion.

*o*o*o*

**2013**

The sunset was gorgeous, the sky all deep orange and indigo blue, palm trees just shadowy silhouettes. John McGarrett’s backyard was still littered with tables and folding chairs and white streamers, but all the guests were gone. It was just Danny, Steve and Grace snuggled up together on the long wicker couch watching the sun go down.

Steve’s arm was stretched out along the back, his fingers playing with the fine hairs on the back of Danny’s neck. Grace was half asleep between them, her head on Danny’s shoulder. 

They were making a new life together in Hawaii. Steve was in the Reserves now, he and Danny doing private security and investigations. They were their own bosses, with employees and health benefits and everything. And Grace was building a relationship with her other grandfather.

“Pretty surreal,” Steve said.

Danny looked down at the shiny wedding band on his finger. “I’ll say.”

His family was staying at the Hilton, having flown in two days prior for the big day. Grace would be staying with them while Steve and Danny went on their honeymoon.

“No regrets?” Steve asked.

“Just that we couldn’t do this sooner.”

“Be a good story for the reunion next year.”

Danny turned his head to look at his newly minted husband, amused. “I didn’t realize we were going to that.”

“Are you kidding? I need to show off my trophy husband.” Even in the dim light Danny could see the flush on Steve’s face. “Besides. I’m feeling nostalgic about Mr. Finchly’s office.”

Danny felt a wave of desire roll over him at the memory. They’d done things in that office no adult person should do on school grounds, and it had been spectacular.

“I love you, you know,” he said.

Steve leaned over Grace and kissed him. “I have a pretty good idea.”

“Stop kissing,” Grace mumbled, snuggling more into Danny. “Trying to sleep.”

Danny laughed, and he and Steve both peppered Grace with kisses until she started giggling and squirming.

“I’m going to bed. Goodnight, Danno.” She gave him a kiss, and then one for Steve. “Goodnight, Dad.”

Danny watched to make sure she got back in the house okay, and then he scooted closer to Steve, who wrapped his arms around Danny.

“This was a good day,” he said.

“The best,” Steve agreed.

They necked like the teenagers they once were before retiring to Steve’s old bedroom to get some sleep. No shenanigans in the house, not with Danny’s new father-in-law right down the hall, but that was okay. He knew how to be patient and wait for what he wanted.

Tomorrow he and Steve would be on their honeymoon. Danny planned to make the most of it.

**Author's Note:**

>  **AN:** When I wrote Making the Best of It (four years ago!!), the only family member of Danny’s that had a name and a screen presence was Matt. Which is why, in this story, the names don’t match. I thought about switching them up, but I didn’t want to spoil the continuity between that story and this one. Just in case you were wondering. ::grins::
> 
> For those of you with a keen eye and a love of Janet Evanovich's Stephanie Plum novels, yes. Steph, Joe and Carlos are all based on the characters from that series. But are not the actual characters, so not a true crossover.
> 
> Title from the song of the same name by Richard Marx.
> 
> **Song List**
> 
> [One, U2](https://youtu.be/ftjEcrrf7r0)
> 
> [Self Esteem, The Offspring](https://youtu.be/Abrn8aVQ76Q)
> 
> [When I Come Around, Green Day](https://youtu.be/i8dh9gDzmz8)
> 
> [Now and Forever, Richard Marx](https://youtu.be/OeDiK2uy3DU)


End file.
